When Should You Ban Explicit Music from Your Kids?

Being a parent often means walking a fine line between a guiding force and a tyrant.  Take explicit music as an example: do you let your kid listen to the music and hope that he doesn’t take it to heart, or do you completely ban the music and enforce strict punishments for disobedience?

 

There is no right answer as to whether you should ban explicit music from your kid.  Despite the many studies that have been done to link the rise of teen problems like pregnancy, drug use and violence to the increasingly explicit song lyrics, there are absolutely no studies which show the effect of explicit lyrics on a kid.  It would be impossible to conduct such as study because there are too many uncontrollable factors which influence kids.  For example, your recent divorce could have a much more profound effect on your kids than that new gangsta rap album.

 

Each kid gets influenced by external factors in a different way.  Some kids will be able to listen to explicit song lyrics without it becoming a corrupting factor.  Others may start to idolize the musicians and take the song lyrics a bit too literally – like any references to getting a gun or f-ing authority.  The truth is though that, if your kid likes the lyrics, he/she probably was already thinking along these lines.  Kids like music because they can identify with it.

 

The best advice that a parent can get in terms of dealing with explicit music is to talk to their kids.  Even if you are tempted to completely ban all forms of music from the house (which would mean shutting down the computer, TV and radio), your kid is still going to get exposed to explicit music outside of the home (unless you also want to lock the kid inside).  By talking to your kid about the music he/she is listening to, you can get an idea of how much influence the music has.

 

First, figure out how whether your kid even understands the song lyrics. You might be surprised that your child completely misunderstands the lyrics.  You can either choose to let the misunderstanding slide or explain the lyrics and why they are bad.  If you think that the message is especially degrading or vile, then ask your kid why he/she likes the song.  Then put the message in context and ask if your kid if that is the type of person he/she wants to be.

 

As a parent, you do always have to set some limits.  When it comes to explicit lyrics, determine what themes are going to get a song banned.  While you can’t completely ban explicit songs, you can always say that you don’t want that in your home. If you decide it is okay to permit a few bad words in the song lyrics, make it clear that your kid is not allowed to use those words.  If the rule gets broken, then the music will have to get banned until your kid can prove him/herself to you again.